22-year-old daughter blocks mother and goes no contact after finding a secret tracking app on her phone, family begs her to forgive mom: "It's not like you were doing anything worth hiding, right?"

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Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Jul 19, 2025 6:00 PM EDT

Raising children is a lifelong commitment. It doesn't change when your kids are finally potty trained, when they get their high school diploma, or when they start raising children of their own. Your babies will always be your babies — well, to some extent. While it is perfectly okay to spoil your adult offspring with their favorite childhood dishes when they come to visit you or to help them out when they are going through a rough patch, you must give them enough room to make mistakes and face consequences in order to become capable, independent adults.
In today's story, a young woman in her early twenties finally moves out, embarking on her first foray into the real, adult world. She think she's a real independent big girl until she uncovers the leash her mom secretly installed on her phone. With the illusion of trust and independence shattered, she blocks her mom on everything. Read the rest down below. 

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  • 01

    My mom secretly tracked me for months after I moved out and I only found out because she messed up.

    Cheezburger Image 10531281920
    via Зображення користувача Maksym Povozniuk
  • 02
    I (22F) finally moved out of my mom's house last year after a lifetime of being micromanaged. She didn't want me to go, but I had to for my sanity. I got a job, a roommate, a life.
    via u/Impressive-Barber833
  • 03
    Last week, I noticed my phone was acting weird. Battery draining. Random pings. My roommate (bless her tech-nerd heart)
    via u/Impressive-Barber833
  • 04
    checked and found a hidden tracking app buried in my settings. I didn't install it. Then we remembered: my mom gifted me this phone after I moved out. She said it was a "fresh start."
    via u/Impressive-Barber833
  • 05
    Real Estate Settings
    via TARIK KIZILKAYA from Getty Images Signature
  • 06
    I called her and she immediately went on defense. Said she "had to know" I was safe. That she only checked "once in a while." Then she dropped this: "It's not like you were doing anything worth hiding, right?"
    via u/Impressive-Barber833

  • Well, whether or not her daughter was doing anything bad that would warrant intervention is sort of besides the point. 

  • 07
    I felt sick. This woman has been tracking my every location, probably watching me go on dates, to doctor appointments, late-night drives when I was crying in the car.
    via u/Impressive-Barber833
  • 08
    I blocked her. Hard cut-off. Now she's texting my relatives to say I'm "paranoid" and "being dramatic." How do you forgive someone who never saw you as an adult?
    via u/Impressive-Barber833
  • 09
    Your location Destination 10 min 5.8km Start
    via Thx4Stock
  • 10
    Bird Brain4101112 She's calling you paranoid and dramatic after admitting to installing a secret tracker on you for the last year. If anyone asks,
    via u/Bird_Brain4101112
  • 11
    simply say, "she was secretly tracking me without my knowledge or consent. Now she is upset because I prefer not to be
    via u/Bird_Brain4101112
  • 12
    electronically stalked". If anyone starts kvetching about "that's your mom!" " she's just worried about you!" Or any such nonsense, simply repeat the above.
    via u/Bird_Brain4101112
  • 13
    No_Appointment_7232 "...and at some point, like all healthy, appropriate parents she's supposed to stop bc I'm an adult. There's no dependable reason for a normal parent to do this."
    via u/No_Appointment_7232
  • 14
    SniffDot Exactly. Framing it plainly like that cuts through all the excuses. No one has the right to secretly monitor you, especially under the guise of love. OP has every right to set boundaries and protect their peace.
    via u/SniffDot
  • 15
    False-Plate6578 "You're being dramatic" is what people say when they get caught doing something messed up. she's not sorry, she's just mad you found out.
    via u/False-Plate6578

  • She's just going to be sneakier next time she tries to exert control.

  • 16
    Mlady_gemstone its not paranoia when its TRUE
    via u/Mlady_gemstone
  • 17
    Delicious-Fox6947 Well clearly she wouldn't be sharing the truth with the people she is yapping to about her daughter being paranoid.
    via u/Delicious-Fox6947
  • 18
    starrywhirlylight You're reacting to a real betrayal. Secretly tracking someone isn't love; it's control. Don't let anyone gaslight you into doubting your right to feel violated and to set hard boundaries.
    via u/starrywhirlylight
  • 19
    Cheezburger Image 10531282688
    via SHVETS production from Pexels
  • 20
    Aggressive_Bug_6896 Check your vehicle and belongings for tracking devices as well.
    via u/Aggressive_Bug_6896
  • 21
    PuffGlim Honestly, that's smart advice. If she went as far as hiding a tracker on the phone, it
    via u/PuffGlim
  • 22
    wouldn't be shocking if she planted something else too. Better to check and know for sure than wonder.
    via u/PuffGlim
  • 23
    BestConfidence1560 Your paranoid? Why because you thought somebody was tracking you and it turns out you were right? A complete violation of your privacy. Absolutely inexcusable.
    via u/BestConfidence1560
  • 24
    Wild_Black_Hat And the same could be said about being called "dramatic". This is not OP acting like it is more serious than it actually is: it IS serious!
    via u/Wild_Black_Hat
  • 25
    phdoofus Cut off your relatives too and anyone else. Just say 'We're all taking a break from each other for awhile until we can all learn to respect boundaries and privacy'
    via u/phdoofus
  • 26
    NeolithicOrkney its likely there are some who think her mom is nuts. Just cuz mom is telling them this, does not mean they believe it.
    via u/NeolithicOrkney
  • 27
    bigredroyaloak The label of paranoid is a projection. What your mother did was an abject invasion of privacy and anyone defending her would be
    via u/bigredroyaloak
  • 28
    on the NC list and blocked. If anyone can't respect my autonomy then they don't get the pleasure of knowing me.
    via u/bigredroyaloak

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relationship advice family drama entitled parents adulting motherhood relationships parenting love family daughter raising kids mom Parenting Fail parents entitled people
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